Last few years I’ve had my heartbroken, now I’m ok, I survived.
To the friends that slowly stopped responding until it had been years since we spoke, my heart is always open for you.
To the family members that let me down, some for the first time, some are repeat offenders my heart is broken.
Some showed me that maybe we are not as close as I thought and my wellbeing is not nor has it ever been their concern. I’m disappointed and our relationships will never be the same but I’m ok.
To the man I fell in love with so fast I failed to see I was standing out there alone I wish you well, because you promised me nothing.
What are the most important things needed to live a good life?
I have been reading and post Covid to an extent feeling the loneliness or rather isolation that was caused by having an excuse to avoid people and the for the last 10 years a device that allows you to ignore people even when they are around you.
This whole ideology of “I don’t need people” is a lie, we all need each other and I don’t know why but social media makes us feel like we should be ashamed to be true to our selves and embrace that. I’ll explain:
Be brave enough to message those people that you have on social media once in a while to ask “hey, do you want to go for a coffee?” And know that it’s ok if they say no, be brave enough to try again with another old friend
Be brave enough to show others that yes I’m in a relationship maybe it won’t work but I’m not going to live in defence mode because I may have to take the post down. It makes me think of that quote that was on my pen from Chapters “What if I fall? O but darling, what if you fly?”
Have empathy for everyone when you can. This can be that annoying co-worker that can’t seem to get it together, that very very very quirky friend or for yourself when you can’t seem to be what the world needs, expects or wants.
Finally humour is one of the most important things to a good life. We see it in the funny posts that we all share with each other. In those moments we allow ourselves to put our phones down we allow something funny to be said or to happen.
I think those three things are the most important elements to having a good life but I would be foolish not to mention that saving also helps in having a good life.
The joke is a little funnier when you have some money in your pockets, you can understand your co-worker a little better if your bills are paid and children are fed and there is no bravery on an empty stomach 😊
The last thing I did for fun was going out with my good friend from high school. I moved away soon after high school and remaining friends across 5000 kms is hard but I spoke to someone a few years ago that mentioned don’t hold on to the things you are missing but just hold to the parts that you still have.
So the part that we still have is no matter how long it has been we still laugh at everything. It used to be out playground shenanigans now it’s the funny things her kids say/do or just random work stuff.
We had some drinks, there’s a snake in the mix and a lot of dancing without that fear of “Am I weird?” that you get with new friends. With old friends it’s yes you’re weird and that is just fine and so it’s just more fun. I don’t know if that answered the question but the last thing I did for fun was hanging out with my old friend.
I’ve been working on being a better person. That has included accepting the bad, the good and the in-between.
It’s also just meant accepting that the vision I have of some perfect future me may never actualize and the existing version is just fine.
I’m considering what relationships still serve me, wondering why I hold on to the ones that do not. Wondering if I give people chances out of compassion or out of fear that I may need that grace in the future.
Fear has showed itself a lot in my quest to be better, I never thought there was anything I couldn’t do but I think as you get older life shows you that there is much to fear.
So I guess I’ve been working on the fear that this may be as good as it gets and acknowledging no accepting that’s ok?
TIGERE.CA 