On Love from Africa

You sit and wonder what is more insulting than your ex asking you if you are still fat or travelling over 3000 miles to be with someone who then avoids you and turns you into a stalker.

Somehow you meet a guy he’s cute and seems lovely but somewhere along the line something always goes terribly wrong. Usually there are signs, little signs that may lead you to think this is not a good guy, but being the ever hopeful romantic who are you to doubt love?  Who are you to miss out on your potential soulmate.  Yes you have actually used those words right?

Who are you to think that a person that spends the first part of your relationship being difficult won’t change?

Then you start to wonder if the problem is you. When the signs that say run this guy is no good why do you run towards them?

Perhaps too many novels that tell you a happy ending will be yours so bring on the heartbreak and bring on the assholes.

But God we pray that at the end of all this prince kinda charming is waiting. O and God please let him have a job o yes and papers.

Now lets look at what else you want in prince kinda charming. You used to be like “they need a diploma” but you let that standard go. Nothing like dropping your standards and then the person ends up married to someone else.

Then you look for a “good guy” but lets just say the difference between the good and the bad is getting thinner and thinner. It always a contest. Are you the girlfriend having to deal with the harem of sidechicks.  Or are you the sidechick knowingly or unknowing, if unknowing being humiliated when the official bae is made known. Decisions decisions this is love in 2018.

Now you almost 30 its starting to come up do you have kids? Nope. Are you married? Nope. Awkward silence follows. 

But it’s really not polite to respond with are you happy in your relationship? Do you wish you had waited to have kids? If you could do it again would you pick YOUR husband? Do you worry that you will resent your children for stopping your career? Are you really and truly happy?

Instead you respond, well I haven’t met the right guy yet or I don’t think I’m ready for children. 

When you are finally around children you honestly start to wonder am I ready to give my life to school runs? Don’t I enjoy sleeping till midday and buying crap that I don’t need. But those babies are just so darn cute how bad could one be. And those husbands do seem awfully handy at times.

On the other hand it’s not all bad right because you have a guy that you have never met saying that he loves you. But you are skeptical, it is not because you aren’t that great but something must be wrong with someone that tells you they love you without meeting you first right? Or is that love in 2018?

Or is the problem that if a guy is serious then all of a sudden they are desperate or something must be wrong with them? You don’t know but it just seems highly suspicious.

So back to the point. Do you enjoy wasting women’s time or you just can’t help it? 

Why can’t guys just leave you alone? They see you living your life and all they want is to f up your shit. This is what is being said about love in 2018 right?

This thing we want called black love will be our downfall.

But when its right it’s so right that how can you not want it.

It can be right right?

#TThought on Love from Africa

7 October 2018 

To be continued

Here I Stand by Paul Robeson

Here are the quotes that stood out to me in the book:  

  1. “Reed is dead now. He won no honours in classroom, pulpit or platform. Yet I remember him with love. Restless, rebellious, scoffing at conventions, defiant of the white man’s law – I’ve known many negroes like Reed. I see them everyday. Blindly, on their own reckless manner, they seek a way out for themselves; alone, they pound with their fists and fury against walls that only the shoulders of many can topple” pg 13 

  2. “And here there were white working men, too, many of them foreign-born, who, unlike the Princeton blue-bloods, could see in s workingman of a darker skin a fellow human being ( a lower paid worker, of course, and perhaps a competitor for a job, but not a person of a totally different caste” pg 17 

  3. “Later I came to understand that the negro artist could not view the matter simply in terms of his individual interests, and that he had a responsibility to his people who rightfully resented the traditional stereotyped portrayals of negroes on stage and screen. So I made a decision : if hollowed and broadway producers did not choose to offer me worthy roles to play, then I would choose but to accept any other kind of offer.” pg 31 

  4. “Furthermore, as long as other Americans are not required to be silent or false in reference to their interests, I shall  insist that to impose such restrictions on negroes is unjust, discriminatory and intolerable” pg 66

  5. This idea is called “Gradualism.” It is said to be a practical and constructive way to achieve the blessings of democracy for coloured  Americans. But the idea itself is but another form of race discrimination: in no other area of our society are lawbreakers granted is an indefinite time to comply with the provisions of the law. There is nothing in the 14th and 15th amendments, the legal guarantees of our full citizenship rights, which says that the constitution is to be enforced “gradually” where Negroes are concerned. Pg. 75

  6. “It is easy for the folks on the top to take a calm philosophical view and tell those who bear the burden to restrain themselves and wait for justice to come” pg. 76

  7. And we should you do more than listen to speeches and then go quietly home. I was spokesman should go to the White House and to Congress and, backed by the massed power of our people, present our demands for action. Then they should come back to the assembled people to tell them what “the man” said so that the people can decide whether they are satisfied or not and what to do about it” pg 94 

  8. “If today it can be said that the Negro people of the United States are lagging behind the progress being made by coloured peoples in other lands, one basic cause for it has been that all too often Negro leadership here has lacked the selfless passion for the people’s welfare that has characterized the leaders of the colonial liberation movements. Among us today is a general recognition – and a grudging acceptance- of the fact that some of our leaders are not only unwilling to make sacrifices but they must see some gain for themselves in what ever the do. A few crumbs for a few is too often hailed as  “progress for the race.” To live in freedom one must be prepared to die to achieve it, and while few if any of us ever called upon to make that supreme sacrifice, no one can ignore the fact that in a difficult struggle those who are in the forefront may suffer cruel blows. He who is not prepared to face the trails of battle will never lead to a triumph. This spirit of dedication, as I have indicated, is abundantly present in the ranks of our people but progress will be slow until it is much more manifest in the character of leadership.” Pg. 103 

  9. “Negro womanhood today is giving us many inspiring examples of steadfast devotion, cool courage under fire, and brilliant generalship in our people’s struggles; and here is a major source for new strength and militancy in negro leadership on every level.”

I think what is important is that we need to keep our eyes on the prize. No-one is excused from the responsibility that comes with blackness. While we have had many celebrities that have helped in moving the fight forward we have to always remember that all celebrities, politicians, or political parties will not always do what is best for black people.

Some do, some are frauds, some try in their own way usually in a manner that is not harmful to themselves as an individual. However we always have to keep in mind that those that are trying to change institutional problems are also restricted by those same institutions.

Today you can think of Colin Kaepernick, he tried to do speak out against an institution  but was he punished for it. I think of Zanu PF or Fidel Castro they tried to challenge the international community and their populations have suffered dearly as a result.

Stopping oppression is not for one person it is for all of us to do what we can when we can and in whatever circumstances we find ourselves in.

 

 

Passion for Policy

To understand the law is important and not just for my ego. It give us all a better tool to deal with all those that try to take advantage of the common person. When something is written down it can be a better way to protect and remember what is right. Written policies help ensure fairness so we dont lose our way as a society.

In 10 years I don’t want to be thinking about what I could have done. I don’t mind where I am in 10 years if I know that I have been fighting the good fight.

I want to ensure that if there is a legal protection or remedy that is available to any disenfranchised person they get it. That if there is a way for me to stick it to the system I do and if there is a law that can be made to help the 99% then we make it.

Who Hurt You – On Love From Africa Selections

Who hurt me?

You did

Why am I so bitter?

Well that time that you hit on my friend, ye that time, ye that made me bitter

Why don’t I trust you?

Well I just went through your phone

Why do I care about what other people are saying?

Well they just showed me your two other girlfriends

Why do I need to put a label on everything?

Well it’s the last little dignity I have

Why am I leaving

Because you hurt me

Why do I think you are like every other guy?

Well every other guy asked me the same question, then went on to do the same things

So again who hurt me?

You did

#TThoughts on Love From Africa

Tigere Tese – Black Political Theory